The First Weeks: Your World Flipped Upside Down

Throughout the nine months of pregnancy you figure that having a baby will be a challenge, but not too difficult. The reality is this...

everything you thought you knew about babies, everything you thought you knew about being a mom, everything you thought  you knew about your spouse is absolutely turned upside down. You learn you really don't know a whole lot until you are pushed to your emotional and mental limits. It's not until that moment that you start to realize one very important thing: you would never trade your life of upside downs and sideways for anything else. 

This week we had our fair share of trials and errors. Questions like who should wake up when she cries? How can I be a better mother and wife? How can I be a better father and husband? and what is our new routine? have been key this week as we have tried to figure out what works best for us as a new little family.

I'd be lying if I said this was easy. Nothing has ever been so emotionally and mentally taxing as becoming a new parent; however, like I said before, I wouldn't trade this for anything. I'm sure I can also speak for my husband when I say that we are completely smitten with this little girl of ours. Lilly has quite a personality that we are slowly discovering. She is so curious. When she is awake she likes to look at everything around her and move her hands and arms all around. She loves to stick out her tongue and has other priceless expressions, which make us giggle. Lilly sleeps. A lot. The outdoors calm her down and we can be sure that a walk in the stroller is welcomed, even if getting her into her carseat is a major struggle.

Another first for us this week was taking Lilly to her first professional photography session. Everything was fine, even blissful, until that first flash went off. After that, it was a race to see if we could get a decent picture before the crying set in. Although the session was only supposed to include Lilly, the photographer brought both me and Kaleb into the frame to help calm her so that we could get more pictures. Needless to say, the session didn't last too long. However, we were able to get a few adorable pictures of our screaming little angel ;)

Even amidst the screams, we do get quite a few laughs. The best happened last night as I brought Lilly into the shower with me. Since she isn't too favorable of baths, we thought maybe the shower would work, and it did! After a nice warm shower, she was ready to be handed out to Daddy to be dried off. Kaleb, however, was not fast enough, and before he could get the diaper on he instead had a nice long stream of pee all over him as well as the bathroom floor, counter, and sink. Understandably, I had a good laugh, especially since I wasn't the one with the pee all over me ;)

We love our little girl and, although she has presented us with more of a challenge than we could have possibly known, we are more than blessed to have her as part of our family. She certainly is perfect for us :)

The "How"

After a few trials of faith and a lot of support, we are so happy that we finally have our little girl.

These last two weeks have been nothing short of a whirlwind. I am going to start at the beginning. 

Friday, August 28th, Kaleb and I headed to the Hospital because I was feeling really really sick. Turns out I had the stomach flu. Yuck. In order to make sure everything was a-okay with the baby, they did some tests and had me do 24-hour urine test as well. After turning in the results on Saturday, we were called back into the doctor’s office on Monday, August 31st, in order to discuss the results. The results were not ideal, to say the least. I was diagnosed with something called preeclampsia. This is a disease that manifests itself as high blood pressure and the tendency to have seizures in high-stress situations. The cure, however, was easy: delivery. After taking my blood pressure one last time, the doctor told us to go home, grab our bags, and return to the hospital that same day (Monday) and I would be induced (basically given a drug, Petocin, in order to speed up the labor process). 

When we arrived at the hospital on Monday, they hooked me up to the Petocin (to help speed up labor) and also on Magnesium (which slows down your system). Now, these two drugs work against one another. However, I needed the Magnesium because it would keep my blood pressure lower and prevent me from having a seizure. After 6 long hours, I hadn’t made any progress, still dilated at 4cm like when I arrived at the hospital. However, with a visit from the doctor and with a few changes made, labor started to speed up. 

After another 6 hours of labor, my body was finally ready and we welcomed Lilly Ruth Kjar at 12:56 am on Tuesday, September 1st. She was 7lbs. 7oz. and 18 inches long. Lots of light-colored brownish-red hair and the cutest little face you ever saw. 

The day after her arrival, we were informed that she had a little bit higher level of jaundice (the disease where your body doesn’t break down the red blood cells and can manifest itself in yellowish skin). She was taken back to the nursery and placed under these large UV lights in order to help her body break down those cells. We were only able to see her when she needed to be fed. It was hard, but we knew it would help her get better. Well, after two days under those lights, her levels continued to rise. So they sent us home with an at-home version of these lights (a bilibed and blanket) and told us that if she stayed under these lights as long as possible, she would eventually get her levels down. 

The concept was great! However, the implementation was less than favorable. Lilly hated the at-home version of the lights. She would basically just scream the entire time, preventing us and her from getting any sleep at all. After another trip to the doctor, Lilly’s levels had only risen and we were faced with a very difficult choice: try the lights at home for a little longer, or admit her to the hospital where she could be under the industrial hospital lights until her levels could lower. By this time, my mom and dad had arrived and they were our support as we admitted Lilly to the hospital and made ourselves comfortable for the stay. Mom, Dad, me, and Kaleb stayed in the hospital, taking sleep shifts as necessary, for the next 24 hours. Let me tell you, there is nothing harder or more emotionally draining than returning home without your little baby. This experience really was a trial of great faith. 

The good news arrived the following afternoon (Sunday, September 6th) when Lilly’s jaundice level lowered enough to return home. Gratitude could not even begin to express how I felt in that moment. We were bringing our baby home.

Since we returned home, we have enjoyed celebrating our little miracle with other family members and expressing gratitude for this little girl who is finally ours.